['I don't want it to be too late for us' stuck in his mind for some reason. He was just so used to being that unwanted child who had to live as someone else just to get people to like him. While it's true he hadn't really had anyone truly, honestly give a damn about him before, there was Ren. He'd always been different from everyone else. There was just something about him that drew Akechi to him for some reason. If this was anybody else, he would have left a long time ago, so what was keeping him here now?]

I... don't know. My entire life has been for nothing up until now and I was a damn fool for not realizing it sooner. Some detective I turned out to be.

[Ah, yep. There's that self-pity. He wasn't taking his near death well. He had no idea how to start healing and moving on when all of it was a lie in the end. He'd lived how everyone would want him to be like, and yet at this point he had no idea what was really him or what wasn't anymore.]

You make it sound like it's so easy to turn everything around.